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Happiness and Balance

I was once asked how I'm so happy with my life single mom no help doing it all by myself.  I didn't know how to reply at the time I just said I don't know I just upon thinking about this moment I wish I would have said well I have a beautiful son wonderful friends great job and a roof over my head also I have done this all on my own something I never would have imagined in a hundred years.

I know I've mentioned it a couple of times in some posts but I found myself when I went hiking at devil's tower. Now this was my awakening hiking may not be the thing for you or it might be who do deep down you just haven't reached that point yet. Reaching that point to get to your awakening is scary now if you read a lot of the past posts I use to be very biblical.

I'm not her anymore I'm more spiritual now and as cheesy as it sounds I let the wind guide me. My brother and sister-in-law are pagans. I thought this was weird at one point and sadly unholy the fact that I was judging them my own family on what they believed in was just not right. I was horrible.

Now I don't care what you believe I will judge you on who you are inviting these amazing people into my life people who make me happy. I do get weird looks when I end up bringing up the point of religion I identify as an electric wiccan. I don't just pray to one type of god and goddess in one culture I pray to who I need.

Now that my mind kind of went of track and that's over with that's part of the reason I'm so happy with my life. I don't judge like I use to I'm open-minded and I just don't care as long as you're a good person. I have this amazing little boy who's growing up before my eyes I have a loving family and an amazing job. I don't know what else there is that I can add to my life to make it better (maybe a boyfriend) people ask me if I'm lonely yes I do get lonely at times (at times?) self-doubt gets to me I over think but then I remember everything I have going for me. (take that thought) I do argue with myself on this topic.

That special someone will show up sometime just don't know when or where might need to send him directions because at times I think he's lost. I'm just kidding but seriously keeping yourself balanced is actually easier than you think.

I meditate and pamper myself here and there. Being a single mom with no help money wise is stressful I'm not gonna sugar coat it. Do I wish I had an S.O? to help me out oh yeah. I don't need to rely on others to help me through so I need therapy? Probably but who has time for that when a trip to the gym is cheaper. Now I know that sounds bad but where I live the nearest counselor is an hour away and nobody comes here once a month or week. So if you work an 8-5 job you gotta figure something else out. I know it doesn't sound healthy but a regular workout actually gets your oxytocin going and that's the chemical in your brain that makes you feel happy. It's also advice I've gotten from a counselor before I didn't have time to go to one.

Once you get that taste of feeling at peace with yourself, you can actually feel it when it's not there which means you're not happy. So don't be afraid to try something new or do something you've been doing that makes you feel good. Find your balance and find your happiness.

Amanda Rost

Instagram: @EpilepticMom


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